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The Rolla Daily News - Rolla, MO
  • Dave Weinbaum: Youth charge racism on top of old fogeys

  • It’s come to my attention that I’ve finally reached the stage in my life when some, especially millennials, refer to me as an old fogey, smartass, conservative, out of touch, bald, gray-beard, old fart, schmuck (the last from my son, who I affectionately call, Putz). Worst of all, they accuse me and my ilk of being racist.
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  • It’s come to my attention that I’ve finally reached the stage in my life when some, especially millennials, refer to me as an old fogey, smartass, conservative, out of touch, bald, gray-beard,  old fart, schmuck (the last from my son, who I affectionately call, Putz). Worst of all, they accuse me and my ilk of being racist. It’s a form of profiling that I was guilty of just a few years ago. Now I’m blown up by my own petard.
    To make a mountain out of an anthill, piling on like Libs at a MSNBC leg-tingling rally for Obama’s 50,000th speech about Obamacare, comes this nasty charge: Old peeps, by our age alone, have racial biases that we’re unable to shake—until they ooze out like an exorcized demon, upon our demise.
    The hurdle for this label isn’t high. We either must be breathing and/or on the right side of the grass. We don’t have to criticize a soul much less an incompetent black president (There I go again!). All we need do is register with one of the two above qualifications and we’re damned to quick death. Young people demand we make room for their fair and balanced outlooks. You see, they believe they have no preconceived notions of prejudice. Humbug!
    None other than Charles Krauthammer has commented on the Old Age Fogey Syndrome (OAFS). His son had the audacity to challenge the Pulitzer Prize winner on his attitude toward race. Clive Bundy said some insensitive stuff about blacks and slavery. Then came LA Clippers owner, Donald Sterling on the cusp of winning a lifetime achievement award from the NAACP, taped by his multiracial self-described archivist girlfriend, with words that got him banned for life from the NBA. Today, he answers that he can’t be a racist—he’s a Jew! Gee Don thanks for throwing all the rest of us Yiden under the Volkswagen!
    We all know that if you’re black you can’t be a racist. Isn’t that right, Jesse, Al, Eric, NAACP and Barack? You and some special white friends have trumped that charge and encouraged the Check your privilege anti-white screed you use to control free speech, especially on college campuses.
    Street corners make poor fathers
    Little is said about black-on-black crime in this country. In fact, until yesterday, we heard not a peep about black Muslim on black Christian crime. Now, out of nowhere, the head of al-Qaeda affiliated Boko Haram, Abubakar Shekau declared he had kidnapped about 300 black girls in Nigeria and was selling them as sex slaves and wives to fellow Muslims. Their crime? They were being educated against the rulings of Sharia Law.
    Page 2 of 2 - Suddenly Obama is sending US personnel to Africa and the CBC is screaming for drones to strike those bastards! Yet, in 2011 when the Republican Congress, FBI and CIA were pushing for a terrorist label for Boko Haram, President Barack Obama’s Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton killed it.
    Hillary is about my age. So is she racist for backing black Muslims and not black Christians? Who did anything when the New Black Panthers were blocking voting polls while armed with clubs? Who did anything when the same group paraded in the streets of Philadelphia and urged blacks to murder white men, their women and their babies?
    I digress because I’m old and frustrated by all this. So, I wrote some lyrics to an old song. Hey, some take out their frustrations on gays—Alec Baldwin!
    To the tune of On Top of Old Smokey:
     
    On top of old fogeys, all wrinkled and gray
    We pitter-patter each passing day
    We shop at our Walmart or work there as greeters
    Then eat early dinner with fellow old geezers.
     
    We talk thru false teeth about pols who are liars
    Our kids call us racist and dream funeral pyres
    Asleep at eight awake by three
    I go to breakfast after a two-hour pee.
     
    In go our teeth all whitened and polished
    We watch Fox News to see what Obama’s demolished.
    Oh dread we were heard by some eavesdropping kid
    He’ll make it go viral on a YouTube Vid.
    On top of old Fogeys all wrinkled and gray
    We pitter-patter with each passing day
    We shop at our Walmart or work there as greeters
    Then eat early dinner with fellow old geezers.
     
    Gotta get to bed early. Us old folks will be scamming our local Embassy Suites out of free breakfasts in the morning.

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